"Homo concedo" refers to the human who quits or gives up. "Homo diligentia" refers to the human who persists or perseveres.
"Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race." -- Calvin Coolidge.
Note that there's a downside to persistence: If you persist with doing things that don't work, they are likely to continue not working. Some people spend decades obsessively persisting with ideas, projects, or actions that seem like obvious and certain dead ends to impartial outside observers.
Of course, if you give up or quit, you never find out if something would eventually have worked if you had just persisted. Some people may even quit just before they would have achieved major success.
I suspect that about 98% of people can be better described as "homo concedo" than "homo diligentia." Why so many people quit will hopefully become clear as you read the "big human failure" discovery.
The discovery started as a result of an email exchange with a correspondent who told me about a self-improvement method called "Af-x Therapy" and "Affectology" originated by Australian Ian White. The correspondent talked about "pre-verbal, pre-conscious emotional scripts" and "learning to love yourself."
The idea of "pre-verbal, pre-conscious emotional scripts" made sense to me because of what I had already learned about "Addicted to Unhappiness" and what Dr. Arthur Janov of "Primal Therapy" had written about "talk therapies" not being able to address early imprints (pre-verbal and pre-conscious).
I have not personally had the benefit yet of Af-x Therapy. (I've had considerable benefit from "Idenics" which at least partially addresses this area.) The book The Tools: Transform Your Problems into Courage, Confidence, and Creativity by Phil Stutz and Barry Michels includes a "Tool" called "Inner Authority," partially designed to address your "Shadow" -- Carl Jung's term for what you don't like about yourself. You may be able to apply "Inner Authority" to at least partially overcome some pre-verbal, pre-conscious emotional scripts.
(Note for rational materialists: Unfortunately, Michels (the original developer) of the Tools), in the process of developing the Tools, seems to have activated a part of his brain some scientists call the "god module." He had some "mystical/religious" experiences causing him to conclude that there are "external higher powers," that "The Source" exists external to people -- the "creator of everything" -- and that "the universe is benevolent and interested in the well-being of each person." Stutz & Michels can be described as having "snapped" into an "external powers cult." They don't realize that all the "powers" they refer to can be described as residing in "Self 2" as described by Timothy Gallwey of "Inner Game" fame. Stutz & Michels also don't seem to realize that it's absurd to believe in a "benevolent universe" and a "benevolent Source" when earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, epidemics, wars, floods, tsunamis, hurricanes, typhoons, etc. result in millions of people dying painfully and prematurely. The Tools of Stutz & Michels can be reformulated in scientific (non-religious/non-mystical) terms -- Tools that enable you to activate and connect to your own hidden higher powers, and also to connect to Reality. Gallwey's "STOP Tool" has a similar objective.)
I suspect that, once you realize that you may be the victim of some pre-verbal, pre-conscious scripts, you may be able to apply Gendlin's "Focusing" Technique to overcome them.
You may also be able to apply "Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT)" to overcome pre-verbal, pre-conscious scripts.
Above is the first part of the discovery. The second part of the "big human failure" discovery I call "hidden slavery." If you're in a relationship with some "entity" (usually called "government") on the basis that this "entity" has the right or authority to dictate what you may or may not do, eat, drink, grow, manufacture, possess, say, read, use as money, etc.; forcibly take any portion of the fruits of your labor, force you to "register for a birth certificate, social security, health care," etc.; then you're in a master-slave relationship. Why do most people seem unaware of this and that they're essentially being treated as "free-range livestock?" Why do they put up with this?
From my earliest memories I know that my parents treated me as their property, their slave. They taught me to do what they said, and to not do what they said I wasn't allowed to do. It's quite clear to me that they also treated me as their slave during the period before I had developed verbally and consciously -- so I acquired some pre-verbal, pre-conscious slave scripts. Most likely, my parents also had some pre-verbal, pre-conscious slave scripts, which they passed on to me...
It seems quite clear to me that practically all humans are the victims of pre-verbal, pre-conscious slave scripts. This explains why they put up with their partial slavery and typically don't object to being treated as free-range livestock.
Why are most humans unaware of their status as partial slaves? My parents certainly never told me that I was their slave. Their treatment of me as their slave was almost certainly unconscious on their part. In school, none of my teachers ever told me that being forced to attend school, sit still, keep quiet, do what the teacher commanded, etc. effectively made me a slave. So, as a result of "typical parenting" and "typical schooling," most humans become partial slaves who are not aware of their status of partial slave.
The third part of the discovery is that most people have "pre-verbal, pre-conscious loser scripts." Why do they have these loser scripts? As babies, before they developed language and consciousness, whenever their was a clash of intentions, wants, or wills, between parents and baby, chances are that baby lost out. So parents effectively teach their babies to be losers. So about 98% of people end up with loser scripts that can't be accessed and overcome through talk therapies.
The fourth part of the discovery explains something that has puzzled me for many years. I've consistently observed that more than 50% of people who join a moneymaking program never fund their accounts so they can start making money. It's like a naseball player who steps up to the plate. The pitcher pitches the ball and the player just looks at the ball. He never swings his bat in an attempt to hit the ball -- even though he wants to hit a home run. What makes it possible for most people to be so "dumb?" Answer: They have "pre-verbal, pre-conscious quit scripts." As babies, their parents taught them to quit. Their parents told them thousands of times: "No!," "Don't...!," "You can't...!" See Robert Fritz and Shad Helmstetter on Negative Programming.
Sometimes when a quit script kicks in, you "freeze" into inaction. You may be able to use the Tool called "Inner Authority" by Stutz & Michels in The Tools: Transform Your Problems into Courage, Confidence, and Creativity to "unfreeze" yourself and take action.
In The Tools Stutz & Michels write:
"The tools I gave them [my patients] worked as promised; they became more confident and creative, more expressive and courageous. The results were so good, I was completely shocked by what happened next: almost every patient stopped using them. I was stupefied. I'd shown my patients the path to a new life and, for no good reason, they'd stepped off it -- even the most enthusiastic ones quit..."
"Most self-help books don't even deal with the issue of quitting..."
Stutz & Michels provide a Tool called "Jeopardy" to overcome the symptom of quitting. But they don't address the cause of quitting: their patients, like practically all other people, are the victims of "pre-verbal, pre-conscious quit scripts." As babies, their parents taught them to quit -- "Stop crying!" Most babies get a barrage of "quit instructions" from their parents.
These pre-verbal, pre-conscious quit scripts make most people "homo concedo" -- people who give up or quit easily.
To become "homo diligentia" -- people who persist or persevere -- you have to overcome your pre-verbal, pre-conscious quit scripts. You can do so by applying "Af-x Therapy" and "Affectology." Other methods you could use include:
Pre-verbal, pre-conscious scripts can also result in a wide range of emotional and/or psychological disorders, including (but not limited to) anxiety, fears, phobias, depression, helplessness (lack of personal power), shyness, negativity, psychological reversal, etc.
The concept of "Make-or-Break Issue" (MBI) is most important. An MBI is something that needs to be fixed first. If a car has a broken engine, you need to fix the engine to make it run. Giving it a new paintjob won't make it run. Similarly, an athlete with a broken leg needs to fix his leg if he wants to run.
Much of the "self-improvement industry" does the equivalent of providing cars with broken engines new paint jobs! Psychotherapist Flip Flippen is a noteworthy exception. In his book The FlipSide: Break Free of the Behaviors That Hold You Back he writes:
"Is it possible that something other than your talents, abilities, personality, or academic achievements will define how far you go in life? Could it be that the things that hold you back -- or constrain you -- are a far more reliable indicator of your success than any skills or talent you may possess? And if it is possible to identify whatever those personal constraints are and break free of them, do you believe that you could soar to new heights in your life? Would you choose to break free of your personal constraints if I could show you what and where they are and how they are affecting you?"
"We have been able to prove year after year, with thousands of success stories, that people who actively choose to identify and remove their personal constraints will fare better than those who do not. It boils down to physics: the lighter the load you carry, the farther you can go. This final law provides hope: you can do something about your current situation that will also have an impact on your future."
"In my work as a psychotherapist, I have two important tasks I must accomplish for every patient: first, I must make a diagnosis and second, I must prescribe the proper treatment. The diagnosis of any situation is critical. If the diagnosis is wrong, then it is difficult -- if not impossible -- to prescribe the correct treatment."
"Personal constraints are just that. They are personal, and they constrain you in many ways. Some are from birth, others from your childhood experiences, and still others you pick up -- like dangerous hitchhikers -- along life's unpredictable road. But no matter where your personal constraints come from, they all have one thing in common: unless you can find and remove them, they will certainly hold you back from your greatest plans, hopes, and aspirations in life."
The FlipSide includes a questionnaire to help readers identify their constraints, and specific approaches to overcome certain constraints.
In accordance with the "theory of constraints," at any given time there may be one factor that constrains an individual more than anything else -- one factor that if addressed will yield the highest returns for the effort invested. Google: "leverage point"; "problem solving techniques"; "theory of constraints"; "root cause analysis"; "fault tree analysis"; five-by-five why's; "barrier analysis"; "causal factor analysis"; "liebig's law"; "triz"; "psychological inertia"; "reverse salient"; "weakest link.") You may find a great deal on how to apply such methods in business, but rather little on how individuals can apply them to their personal lives.
A big challenge is to persuade people to embark on a "journey of self-development," to enable them to achieve some quick benefits, and to persuade them to follow through.
Part of the challenge may also be that part of the human brain may have an "agenda" to keep the brain itself in a state of low-level awareness (or half asleep). How can the systems revealed in the right column of Page 3 be perpetuated, if the vast majority of humans were not half asleep? (Google: "John E. Sarno" and "Mindbody (TMS) Theory.") See also Understand Sarno's Mindbody (TMS) Theory.
Questionnaires (and/or an interactive program) could be developed to enable individuals to identify what is likely to yield the highest returns for the self-development efforts they invest in. This is similar to a competent doctor examining a patient, performing tests to determine what's wrong, formulating a diagnosis, and recommending a course of treatment. Clients could be provided with training, coaching, products, and services that are likely to benefit them most -- and accelerate their self-development most.
The 5 "Bomb in the Brain" videos are of the utmost importance to anyone who wants to improve themselves and/or the world!
The "Bomb in the Brain" videos could help you identify an important MBI (Make-or-Break Issue). If you have a high "ACE Score," then you may want to tackle the "bomb in your brain" first. See Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study, where you can download a Pdf to help you calculate your "ACE Score."
Note what Dr. Vincent Felitti says in the second video about clients reducing their number of doctor visits by 35% during the ensuing 2 years, after talking to a doctor for 2-3 minutes about their "ACEs" (adverse childhood experiences). See Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study, where you can download a Pdf to help you calculate your "ACE Score."
It's also possible that some people would benefit most by first addressing their pre-verbal, pre-conscious scripts. In addition to the direct benefits from overcoming these scripts, doing so could make it easier and more effective to recover from any later Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs).
YOUR BRAIN IS YOUR GREATEST ASSET! At least, it's POTENTIALLY your greatest asset. Many people use their own brains more to sabotage than to aid their own success. I emerged from school with a mind PROGRAMMED FOR MEDIOCRITY! The same may apply to you. I highly recommend the book Simple Steps to Impossible Dreams: The Fifteen Power Secrets of the World's Most Successful People by Steven K. Scott. He writes in terms of Six Chains that hold you back:
Does Scott's assertion that only one in a million or one in 10 million people achieve their dreams imply that all the "normal" or "average" people who don't achieve their dreams have been programmed for mediocrity? The answer is an emphatic "Yes!" Not only have they been programmed for mediocrity from their youth, but earlier than that. Their birth could have been painful. They could have started imprinting scripts while in the womb! And they may even have inherited "genetic programming" from their ancestors! See Man the Fallen Ape by Branko Bokun.
In addition to the "homo concedo" and "homo diligentsia" distinction, we can also think of "homo mediocris" and "homo competentia." Renowned Internet marketer Armand Morin is well-known for saying that 97% of people who attempt to make money online typically fail. Reportedly, he even predicts that 97% of those who attend his own seminars and workshops will fail to produce worthwhile results.
Some psychological research has been done to indicate that disadvantaged people consistently underestimate their disadvantages -- do a Google search for "denial of personal disadvantage." When I first saw the phrase "denial of personal disadvantage" it hit me like a ton of bricks! People in general (homo mediocris) are not aware of their disadvantages. Maybe it's too threatening to their brittle self-esteem to admit their disadvantages. So they deny them and do nothing about them. They stick their heads under the sand, like proverbial ostriches. I found two interesting references on the Internet:
Part of the phenomenon of denial is that many people -- maybe more than 90% -- when reading the above, say to themselves, "This applies to most other people, but not to me!" Well, dear reader, I have news for you. The chances may be above 90% that it applies to you, maybe at least in some areas of your life. For more on denial, see #TL03E: The Many Forms of Denial.
Several psychological studies have indicated that the less competent people are in some area of life, the more likely they are to overestimate their level of competence in that area. This is another way of saying, the more disadvantaged you are in some area of life, the more likely you are to deny your disadvantage in that area.
"Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge" -- Charles Darwin (1871)
For more on this topic, see #TL10E: The Power of Doing Things Right.
Mediocrity may hide itself! If you're mediocre in some areas of your life, you may also be mediocre at recognizing your mediocrity! You may suspect that if in some areas of your life you're not producing desireable results, then mediocrity might be involved...
I suspect that for most members of homo mediocris, to gain significant benefits from Scott's book, they would first have to handle their pre-verbal, pre-conscious scripts. Part I of Scott's book is titled: "You've Got the Power... But You're Stuck on the Launching Pad!" Part II is titled: "Cutting the Six Chains." But he missed the most important chain of all: pre-verbal, pre-conscious scripts! This is most likely what keeps most members of homo mediocris "stuck on the launching pad" more than anything else.
Here are some points from Scott's book:
The "greatest computer in the universe" is, of course, your brain -- or "necktop computer" as Dr. Hewitt-Gleeson calls it. Hopefully your brain hasn't been damaged beyond hope of recovery. The best way to find out is do your best to upgrade it!
Above Steven Scott indicates that most of us have been programmed to be "average" -- i.e., to be mediocre. There are also other ways many of us have been programmed to be mediocre. One of them is having "command phrases" programmed into our brains. It's possible that as a child Bill O'Reilly was also pretty obnoxious. So his parents and teachers probably told him to "shut up!" more times than he can remember.
So it's likely that "shut up!" has been programmed into his brain as a "command phrase." If so, certain situations will trigger the command phrase and it will automatically come out of his mouth. It's possible that he has no control over it. Possibly, in certain situations, Bill O'Reilly becomes a "shut-up!-robot."
Richard Wetherill has written a Dictionary of Typical Command Phrases. Here are the command phrases he lists for "negativism":
A habitually negative man may have a large number of such command phrases programmed in his brain. At times, they appear as "automatic thoughts, voices, or commands" in his head, in the same way that "shut up!" probably appears in Bill O'Reilly's head. Some peole are dominated by such command phrases. For more on this phenomenon and how to handle it, see #TL12: How to Achieve Emotional Control.
If you sometimes "get stuck in a fixed identity" -- may apply to Bill O'reilly -- that manifests as fixed behavior patterns (often inappropriate), I suggest you check out Idenics.
According to Robert Anton Wilson (The Illuminati Papers):
"The genetic portion of stupidity is programmed into all of us and consists of 'typical mammalian behavior.' That is, a great deal of the human nervous system is on autopilot, like the closely related chimpanzee nervous system and the more distantly related cow nervous system. The programs of territoriality, pack hierarchy, etc., are evolutionary stable strategies and hence work mechanically, without conscious thought. These evolutionary relative successes became genetic programs because they work well enough for the ordinary mammal in ordinary mammalian affairs. They only become stupidities in human beings, where the higher cortical centers have been developed as a monitoring system to feed back more sophisticated survival techniques and correct these stereotyped programs with more flexible ones. In short, to the extent that a human follows the genetic primate-pack patterns, without feedback from the cortex, that human is still acting like an ape, and hasn't acquired facility in using the New Brain."
According to Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience):
"Submission to genetic programming can become quite dangerous, because it leaves us helpless. A person who cannot override genetic instructions when necessary is always vulnerable. Instead of deciding how to act in terms of personal goals, he has to surrender to the things that his body has been programmed (or misprogrammed) to do. One must particularly achieve control over instinctual drives to achieve a healthy independence of society, for as long as we respond predictably to what feels good and what feels bad, it is easy for others to exploit our preferences for their own ends."
According to Eric Berne (Games People Play):
"PARENTS, deliberately or unaware, teach their children from birth how to behave, think, feel and perceive. Liberation from these influences is no easy matter, since they are deeply ingrained and are necessary during the first two or three decades of life for biological and social survival. Indeed, such liberation is only possible at all because the individual starts off in an autonomous state, that is, capable of awareness, spontaneity and intimacy, and he has some discretion as to which parts of his parents' teachings he will accept. At certain specific moments early in his life he decides how he is going to adapt to them. It is because his adaptation is in the nature of a series of decisions that it can be undone, since decisions are reversible under favorable circumstances.
The attainment of autonomy, then, consists of the overthrow of all [the primitive genetic social programs and unconscious or ritual games and life scripts (my paraphrase)]. And such overthrow is never final: there is a continual battle against sinking back into the old ways.
First... [G]ames are passed on from generation to generation], the weight of a whole tribal or family historical tradition has to be lifted..., then the influence of the individual parental, societal and cultural background has to be thrown off. The same must be done with the demands of contemporary society at large, and finally the advantages derived from one's immediate social circle have to be partly or wholly sacrificed...
For certain fortunate people there is something which transcends all classifications of behavior, and that is awareness; something which rises above the programming of the past, and that is spontaneity; and something that is more rewarding than games, and that is intimacy. But all three of these may be frightening and even perilous to the unprepared."
To get an appreciation of the extent to which practically all of us were negatively programmed during childhood, I strongly recommend that you read What to Say When You Talk to Your Self by Shad Helmstetter. Much of our negative programming comes from all the times our parents said "no" to us. They said "no" many more times than they said "yes." They also said many other negative things. Many of these negatives now reside in our brains in the form of behavior patterns that don't work very well. Helmstetter claims that for most people the percentage of negative programming is around 75 percent -- in other words, 75 percent of our "personal brain programs" could be more or less dysfunctional. Helmstetter estimates that most of us were told "no" and "you can't do that" and "you'll hurt yourself" about 150,000 times!
Helmstetter's method for replacing the negative programs with positive programs he calls "Self-Talk." He provides Self-Talk examples for specific purposes like: how to stop smoking, how to improve self-esteem, etc.
Helmstetter has written a more recent book called Choices in which he suggests twelve basic choices:
Helmstetter has also written two other books: The Self-Talk Solution and Finding the Fountain of Youth Inside Yourself. I recommend all his books.
|Primitive Genetic Social Programs: A partial list of primitive genetic social programs many of us suffer from. You can no doubt extend the list by studying books on human history, nature, culture, and anthropology. (Also some Modern Programs).||Unconscious or Ritual Games and Life Scripts: A list of games, scripts, and archetypes from Games People Play by Eric Berne, M.D., Beyond Games and Scripts by Eric Berne, M.D. edited by Claude Steiner and Carmen Kerr, and Scripts People Live by Claude M. Steiner (plus a few I added).|
|Fight, flight, or freeze||Kill or be killed||Adapted child||Adult||Ain't budging|
|Conquer or be conquered||Rule or be ruled||Ain't it awful||Ain't it wonderful||Alcoholic|
|No rule = chaos and disorder = anarchy||Expand the empire||Alpha-ape||Aphorodite||Athena|
|Make laws to control the people||Obey or die (obedience to authority)||Big daddy||The big store||Black is beautiful|
|Punish, torture, and/or kill the rebels/criminals/cowards/infidels/strangers||Food (and everything else) is scarce||Blemish||Mr. Bruto||Busman's holiday|
|Eat all you can while the food lasts||Take magic powder/drink to feel good||Buy me something||Captain Marvel||Cavalier|
|It is easier to steal than to work/produce||Plunder/tax the weak||Child||Cinderella||Cold pricklies|
|This is my/our land (territorial imperative)||These are my/our animals||Tantrum||Clever child||Button pusher|
|Appease the gods with ritual sacrifice (ritual execution, ritual punishment)||Sacrifice is noble||Connection||Cops and Robbers||Corner|
|It is fate/inevitable||There's a reason for everything||Courtroom||Crazy child||Creeping beauty|
|He/she/they didn't die in vain||All other tribes are enemies||Critical parent||Cry baby||Debtor|
|Tribal alliances are temporary expedients||Plunder and destroy the lands/homes/treasures of the conquered||Doesn't everybody?||Do me something||Family drama|
|Rape the women of the conquered||Kill the conquered and their families||Fat woman||Felix, Miss||Food-aholic|
|Capture and enslave the conquered||Expulsion from the tribe = death||Foundling||Frigid woman||Frog prince|
|Keep out strangers/enemies||Build walls/barriers to keep out strangers/enemies||Gee, you're wonderful, professor||Good negro||Greenhouse|
|Bear many children to strengthen the tribe||Bear many children to look after us in old age||Greeting rituals||Guardian angel||Guerilla warfare|
|Teach the children the ways of the tribe (ritual "education")||Fight and kill is the solution||Guerilla witch||Happy to help||Harried|
|Bravery in battle is glorious||Make better weapons||Hera||High and proud||Hold the line|
|Parade the vanquished in the streets||Death is not the end||Homely sage||Hot potato||How do you get out of here|
|Worship the mountain/sun/stars/god||Worship the hero/leader/ancestors||If it weren't for you/him/her/them||If you can't prove it you can't do it||I'll show them|
|The witch-doctor casts spells that perform miracles (government* does for people what they can't do for themselves)||Envy/hate the wealthy/powerful||I'm only trying to help you||Indigence||Intellectual|
|Spiritual/mystical/religious escape||I love my captor||It says in the Bible||Jerk||Jesus Christ|
|My captor can do no wrong||Can't survive without my captor||Jock||Kick me||The king (or queen) has no clothes|
|Helpless victim||Hopeless victim||Knock some sense into 'em||Let's pull a fast one on Joey||Let's you and him fight|
|Suffering victim||Dying patient||Never satisfied||Can't get enough||I'm better then you|
|Obedient slave||Rebellious slave||Look how hard I tried||Man hater||Man in front of the woman|
|Gang member||Sex offendor||The meeting is adjourned||My father is better than yours||Gold digger|
|Career criminal||Mafia boss||Miss America||Mr. America||Mother Hubbard|
|Bank robber||Burglar||Mother's good little boy||My-fixed-idea-makes-me-
|Housewife||Career woman||Natural child||Nobody loves me||Mr. Nobody|
|Bully||Starving artist||No joy||No love||No mind|
|Starving actor||Starving writer||Not invented here||My ship will come in||It's just a matter of time|
|Rockstar||Celebrity||Now I've got you, you son of a bitch||Nurse||Nurturing parent|
|Homeless hobo||Bodyguard||Pig parent||Pill-oholic||Pitched battle|
|Cop||Detective||Plastic fuzzies||Plastic woman||Playboy|
|Soldier||Drug addict||Poor little me||Preacher||Truth must prevail|
|Sex addict||Tycoon||Drifter||Prince charming||Psychiatry|
|Perennial Failure||Can't do it||Queen bee||Rapo||Rein, miss|
|Beach bum||Coach||Rescue/Rescuer||Robin Hood||Mr. Salvador|
|Politician||Conman||Schlemiel||See what you made me do||Sleeping Beauty|
|Spoiled child||Always get out of trouble||Slob||Snob||Spoiler/Wet blanket|
|Escape artist||Beat the system||Spunky child||The stocking game||Stupid|
|Determined Loser||Blame everyone else||Sulk||Sweetheart||Teacher|
|I just can't get it right||I always get into trouble||They'll be glad they knew me||Clumsy oaf||Accident prone|
|Liberty in our time||Freedom fighter||Torn mother||True believer||Uproar|
|Always complain||Beat the shit out of 'em||Victim||Waiting for rigor mortis||Warm fuzzies|
|I'm a worthless piece of shit||Social Climber||Warm fuzzies Wet blanket/Spoiler||Why don't you - yes but||Wipe them out|
|Name dropper||Great Manipulator||Witch||Woman behind the man||Woman hater|
|Master chessplayer||Great writer||Wooden leg||You can't trust anybody||You got me into this|
|Comedian||Invader||Never grow up||Adult ("psychological child") who thinks he/she has grown up||Masochist|
You may think that you're living the life you've designed for yourself, with the career you've chosen, etc. But you may also be "living a prewritten script" much like an actor in a play -- with the difference that the actor knows he's just playing a role, while you may not realize that much of your life has been that of an "actor in a play" who doesn't know that he or she has been "playing a role in a play."
You can use the above table to help determine whether you've been an "unaware actor in a play" and what role(s) you've been playing. Most of the items in the three right-hand columns are "scripts" that have been identified and described in "Transactional Analysis." Generally, you can find details for the scripts by doing Google searches, e.g.: courtroom "transactional analysis." (You can also find the "scripts" in books on Transactional Analysis.)
See also Our Legacy of Bad Programs.
Great book: Primal Healing: Access the Incredible Power of Feelings to Improve Your Health by Dr. Arthur Janov. Many people are to some extent "lived by their early imprints." Some people suffer from "helplessness imprints" that pervade much of their lives. This is described by Dr. Arthur Janov in Chapter 4: "The Imprint: How It Runs Our Lives."
Helplessness imprints can be described by phrases like: "No one wants me"; "They never wanted me"; "What's the use of trying"; "I'm all alone"; "Nobody loves me"; "Trying to get love is useless"; "I don't want to work anymore"; "I've done enough"; "I am not going to do it"; "I don't get any help"; "Nothing I do is worth anything"; "There is something wrong with me"; "Nothing can save me"; "I'm not worth s_ _t for anything"; etc. However, these are shallow descriptions of the tips of icebergs. The imprints include feelings, emotions, and pain stored as deep memories in the "whole human system."
Deep imprints, including those related to helplessness, impact the whole human system: mind, brain, and body. Quotes from Primal Healing:
"To feel defeated is real -- a real reaction to a real event of being deprived, any struggle at birth due to a heavy anesthetic administered to the mother, not some neurotic aberration."
"The imprint is really an ensemble of reactions that is impressed simultaneously into the whole system."
"Chronic high blodd pressure is a good example of how memory lives within our brain system -- it is an expression of a memory, a neurological imprint, which manifests physiologically."
"Hopelessness, helplessness, despair, and resignation can be imprinted through diminished oxygen [at birth]..."
"The more painkillers a woman takes during labor, the more likely her child will be to abuse drugs or alcohol later on."
"In trying to kill the pain, we are sometimes forced into behaviors that ruin our lives."
"For true and lasting change, deep levels of the brain must change physiologically, enabling key structures within the brain to recalibrate to optimal, healthy levels."
"It is not possible to truly get well by way of some easy, feel-good process, which is what the selling point is behind meditation, hypnosis, acupuncture, and all cognitive therapies."
Chapter 10 of Primal Healing is titled "Why We Have to Relive in Order to Get Well." You can't just talk or think yourself out of the effects of imprints; to cure yourself you have to relive them.
From my own perusal of "success and self-improvement products and services," and observing the effects on, and the results produced for, others, I've concluded that everything I've gotten involved with or come across so far contributes very little, if anything, to the greater success of homo mediocris. The main reason, I contend, is that they typically don't address pre-verbal, pre-conscious scripts sufficiently.
So the sad situation is that practically nobody provides the means for homo mediocris to improve and become significantly more successful. A revealing book that supports this contention is SHAM: How the Self-Help Movement Made America Helpless by Steve Salerno. Salerno suggests that much of the "Self-Help and Actualization Movement" (SHAM) tends to make people worse.
Maybe, in the absence of tackling and overcoming pre-verbal, pre-conscious scripts, homo mediocris is impervious to self-improvement and becoming significantly more successful. Maybe the "Self-Help and Actualization Movement" (SHAM) is so big and profitable, enabling some of its "top gurus" to rake in millions, because practically nothing works for homo mediocris. So the demand remains huge and insatiable.
It may be similar to the "gurus" selling information online on how to make millions online. Some "gurus" make millions selling their "secrets." But practically nothing works for homo mediocris. So the demand remains huge and insatiable.
Nevertheless, there may be at least a little hope for homo mediocris. Martin E. P. Seligman, Ph.D. author of What You Can Change and What You Can't writes: "Traditionally, most people in the West have believed that human character is fixed and unalterable, that people do not and cannot improve, advance, or perfect themselves. The change from a deep belief in the unchangeability of chracter to an equally deep belief in the capacity to improve is recent, and it represents one of the most fundamental and important revolutions in modern thought... The Maximal Self believes that it can change and improve, and this very belief allows change and improvement. The dogma of human plasticity tends to fulfill itself."
Chapter 11 of Primal Healing is titled "Toward a Therapy of Feeling: One Cure for Many Diseases." Janov provides the following "key phenomena in the development of emotional afflictions":
- "The underlying cause of many emotional problems and symptoms is pain.
- This pain stems from early in life, not the least of which is womb-life and birth.
- The pain is imprinted into the central nervous system and throughout the body.
- The pain is coded and stored in key brain systems, particularly the limbic system and brainstem, and spreads its tentacles to other parts of one's physiology.
- The pain can be registered on three key levels of brain function or levels of consciousness [brainstem, limbic system, and neocortex].
- The time or epoch in which the trauma occurred will determine where in the brain it is stored and the amount of damage it will produce.
- The pain produces an overload of input into the brain system, which...
- Produces a neurologic shutdown or gating to keep the pain from conscious-awareness.
- As a result of the gating, the painful feelings on lower brain levels reverberate in a loop in lower brain structures.
- There is then a dislocation of function in many key biologic systems as the energy of the pain spreads.
- The pain produces a dissociation or disconnection among those levels, stopping a fluid access among them.
- A proper therapeutic goal must be a connection between lower-level imprinted traumas and conscious-awareness."
What's needed is a team of people with the appropriate expertise to study "Af-x Therapy" and Primal Healing by Dr. Arthur Janov. They should probably also study Addicted to Unhappiness: Free yourself from moods and behaviors that undermine relationships, work, and the life you want by Martha Heineman Pieper, PhD and William J. Pieper, MD -- see Addicted to Unhappiness -- as well as Reclaiming Your Life: A Step-by-Step Guide to Using Regression Therapy to Overcome the Effects of Childhood Abuse by Jean Jenson, M.S.W.
In my opinion, what's needed is a methodology much faster than Primal Therapy. Janov writes: "As a result of four separate brainwave studies we discovered a brain system with better balanced right and left hemispheres after one year of Primal Therapy." That's much too slow. With Idenics it typically takes a few hours to handle all your "Unwanted Conditions!"
EFT may also be relevant. EFT consists of a number of related techniques that can be learned within minutes -- "Emotional Freedom Techniques." It may be possible to use EFT to handle Janov's "deep imprinys." You can download a free EFT Manual from the Emotional Freedom Techniques website.
After having studied the indicated materials, the next step for the team members would be to formulate a tentative methodology, incorporating Janov's "principles of a proper therapy":
- The therapist must help the patient access key imprints on the various levels of consciousness [brainstem, limbic system, and neocortex], and not offer his or her insights.
- The suffering component of these traumatic imprints needs to be brought to cortical consciousness for connection. It is this component that lies in the unconscious and drives illogical and irrational behaviors and ideas.
- The connection id the sine qua non of an effective therapy and for the resolution of many symptoms and deviated behaviors and ideas.
- Once connection occurs, the trauma is finally integrated, the overload of input is connected to cortical centers, and it is finally dispersed. Integration means that repression is lifted and there is no longer a constant need to hold down feelings. Nothing has to be said, as such. It is just understood. If neither have access to feelings, there is no question that feelings will be ignored, as will evolutionary science.
- We need an experiential therapy that colesces with current neurologic research, providing deep access to low-level neurologic processes.
- This access is accomplished in titrated doses to permit measured connection and integration, which creates permanent changes in many biologic parameters, most importantly, in the central nervous system.
- Once this is done, there will no longer be major dislocation of function and the whole system is normalized physiologically and in the realm of ideas and beliefs.
- With resolution we can see changes throughout the biologic system from the immune system to the neurologic.
The next step for the team members would be to test the new methodology on themselves and refine it. It's vital that the team members heal themselves to whatever extent necessary.
Then make the methodology available to the rest of the world...
"Your new Page 2 of CertoPower is very easy to read and, I feel sets out our pre-verbal conditioning really well. It also addresses the dilemma of attempting to 'get to' the REAL cause of 'why we are the way we are', through any therapy that uses some form of connection to or association with verbalisation or therapist diagnosis/input.
I have been in contact with Ian White (the originator of "Af-x Therapy") again and have asked him to become involved with our discussions. I believe it would be very beneficial for him to be invited to have continued dialogue with all those having input into bringing CertoPower to being. Ian has so many years of research into the areas of 'subconscious workings of the human organism, that I feel it is imperative he be closely involved with bringing to fruition a program that will work for the vast majority of people and also 'building' a package that can be delivered via CertoPower and JBP. His knowledge far surpasses mine and for this reason I have asked him to take a more prominent role in our discussions, which is I believe what you have requested earlier in our emails.
At the risk of sounding presumptious, the reason why Af-x works is because it enables the client to 'cut to the core, the real root' of the CAUSE of their problems, and doesn't spend any time/ energy with symptomology. The mechanism for this is TRANSDERIVATIONAL SEARCH. Many therapies can go some way to dealing with symptoms, change mechanisms and behavioural/attitudanal change, but these are in the main dealing with verbal, instructional inputs.
By utilising the capacity of TRANSDERIVATIONAL SEARCH at the subconscious level, we are able to 'deal with' the cause of our problems, and bring about safe, ongoing change to restore balance within our being.
I have asked Ian to send you further information on Af-x and his many years of experience. This began with various forms of hypnotherapy, zen mindfulness, etc. through to his ultimate formulation of Af-x and its incredible rate of successful outcomes across a huge cross section of people.
I look forward to further discussions and dialogue as we collectively work on this WONDERFUL and much needed project."
Note: The purpose of the Kagin video is not to offend anyone, but to point to the possibility of developing rituals that mock pre-verbal, pre-conscious scripts in order to strip them of their meaning and destroy them. If you ascribe any meaning to the video, it's a meaning you created. The meaning isn't in the video; it's in you!
A powerful method can be used to aid you in overcoming your automatic and unconscious creation of meanings: "It doesn't mean anything!" or "It means nothing!" Whenever you think anything means something, you can remind yourself that "It doesn't mean anything!" or "It means nothing!" or "It has no meaning." The fact is that, from your perspective, you create all the meaning in the universe. It may take months or even years for you to fully realize this, because practically all humans are "habitual unconscious meaning creators." If you persist in using your "no-meaning method," you will eventually make some major success breakthroughs!
ACKNOWLEDGMENT: These lessons have been adapted from those provided by "A Course in Miracles."
You may want to read a few of them a day and reflect about them. You could also keep a journal and write down any thoughts the lessons stimulate for you.
LESSON 1: Nothing I See Means Anything.
The reason this is so is that I create all the meaning there can be for me. Up till now, I may have been completely unaware of how and why I have been creating meanings for everything I see.
LESSON 2: In The Form Of Judgments, I Have Given What I See All The Meaning It Has For Me.
I may have judged everything I looked at, which may have clouded my vision. This may have distorted my view of some aspects of reality, because I have added my judgments to the reality available for me to see. I am willing to recognize that some of my judgments may have clouded my vision. If possible, and where appropriate, I would like to see reality more accurately by removing the "judgment lens" through which I've been looking.
LESSON 3: I May Have Misunderstood Some Things I Saw.
How can I understand what I see if my judgments get between me and reality? Is it possible that my judgments and interpretations have prevented me from seeing reality as it really is? Could it be possible that fundamentally reality cannot be understood? In other words, can I conceive the possibility that reality is fundamentally not understandable? Is it possible that I may have used my judgments and interpretations to create the illusion of "understanding?"
LESSON 4: What Is Understanding?
When I say, "I understand...," I can then explain, "It works like this..." Then I make something else "stand under" what I claim to understand. In effect, I make one thing "stand for another." This is a metaphor. But how can one thing "stand for another thing?" Or how can a second thing "stand under" a first thing to enable me to understand the first thing? Is it possible that the best I can do is create the illusion of "understanding?" Is it possible that my "understanding" will sometimes seem to work and at other times may not work?
LESSON 5: My Thoughts Do Not Mean Anything In Themselves.
The thoughts of which I am aware do not mean anything because I create the meaning and add them to my thoughts. Some of what I call "my" thoughts may not even be my real thoughts. Some thoughts may come automatically from ancient parts of my brain. They have no meaning. I do not have to add any meaning to them. Some of these thoughts can be harmful to me and I am willing to "just let them go." I can thank them and let them go. I recognize that my thoughts inherently mean nothing, and I can let them go. Could this be a better choice than some of the choices I made before?
LESSON 6: I Am Seldom (If Ever) Upset For The Reason I Think.
What if I almost never get upset for the reason I think? What if I really get upset because I make judgments and interpretations? What if I really get upset about my own judgments and interpretations, and then blame it on somebody or something else? Am I constantly trying to justify my thoughts? Am I constantly trying to make them true? Am I using my judgments and interpretations to make people and things my enemies, so I can justify my anger at them and think that my attacks against them are warranted? How much have I been distorting things I saw by falsely assigning to them the role of upsetting me? How often have I done this to defend a thought system that has hurt me? Do I still want such a thought system? Am I willing to let it go?
LESSON 7: Sometimes I Am Upset Because I "See" What Is Not There.
Reality can seem frightening to me (for example, if I'm attacked by a wild animal), but reality may not always be as frightening as I think. Reality simply is. The "frightening" is a meaning I created. It may or may not be appropriate. When I get upset, it is often because I have replaced reality with illusions I made up. The illusions can be upsetting because I have given them false "reality." Thus I can regard my own illusions as "reality."
LESSON 8: I See Only The Past.
As I look about, I may condemn the world I look upon. I may call this "seeing." I may hold the past against everyone and everything, making them my enemies. When I have forgiven myself and/or accepted myself (as appropriate), I can come closer to seeing the actual reality that exists.
LESSON 9: My Mind Is Preoccupied With Past Thoughts.
I see only my own thoughts, and my mind is preoccupied with the past. What, then, can I see as it is? Let me remember that I don't have to look on the past to prevent the present from invading my mind. Let me understand that I may be trying to use time against myself or others. Let me learn to give the past away and let it go, realizing that in so doing I am giving up nothing.
LESSON 10: I See Nothing As It Is Now.
If I see nothing as it is now, it can truly be said that I see nothing. I can see only what is now. The choice is not whether to see the past or the present; the choice is merely whether to see or not. I may have chosen to "see" what wasn't there, costing me my vision. Now I can choose again, so that I may see.
LESSON 11: My Thoughts Do Not Mean Anything.
My thoughts in themselves have no meaning. I can assign whatever meanings I like to my thoughts. I am the creator of these meanings.
LESSON 12: My Meaningless Thoughts Are Showing Me A Meaningless World.
Since the thoughts of which I am aware do not mean anything, the world my thoughts reflect also cannot have any meaning. Reality is what it is -- meaningless. I can have real thoughts as well as "crazy" thoughts. I can see a real world, if I look to my real thoughts as my guide for seeing.
LESSON 13: I Am Upset Because I See A Meaningless World.
"Crazy" thoughts can be "upsetting" to me. If I get "upset," I'm doing the "upsetting" to myself. Contemplating that the world might be meaningless could be "upsetting." It may be difficult to confront a meaningless world. I may detest a "vacuum of meaning." I may put my own judgments, interpretations, and illusions into the vacuum. Then I may claim that my own judgments, interpretations, and illusions are the "Meaning of the Universe." Realize that doing this might be "crazy."
LESSON 14: A Meaningless World May Engender Fear.
Any fear I experience when contemplating a Meaningless World, is fear I created. Try to answer the question: "What is the meaning of the universe?" If you answer, "The Universe has no Meaning," then you are correct. Whatever other answers you come up will be your own judgments, interpretations, and illusions. I am free to choose whatever thoughts and emotions about the world I like. These thoughts and emotions will be my creations and are unlikely to be relevant to reality.
LESSON 15: My Thoughts Are Images I Have Made.
Whatever I see and what I don't see may reflect my thoughts. I may see the "ugly world," while not seeing the "beautiful world." Or I might see the "beautiful world," while not seeing the "ugly world." In either case, I created both the "ugly" and the "beautiful." They are images in my head. Reality simply is the way it is.
LESSON 16: I Have No Neutral Thoughts.
Neutral thoughts are impossible because all thoughts have power -- positive power or negative power. They will either create a false world in my head, or lead me to the real world. Any false world I see arises from my thinking errors. The real world reveals itself to my eyes as I correctmy thinking errors. My thoughts cannot be neither true nor false. They must be one or the other. What I see shows me which they are.
LESSON 17: I See No Neutral Things.
What I see reflects what I think. If I did not think I would not exist. Let me look at the world I see as a representation of my own state of mind. I know that my state of mind can change. And so I also know the world I see can change as well.
LESSON 18: I Am Alone In Experiencing The Effects Of My Seeing.
"You are not alone" may be a comforting deception, but does it reflect the real world? Who, but I, can be responsible for the effects of what I see?
LESSON 19: I Am Alone In Experiencing The Effects Of My Thoughts.
"You are not alone" may be a comforting deception, but does it reflect the real world? Who, but I, can be responsible for the effects of what I think?
LESSON 20: I Am Determined To See.
Recognizing that my thoughts are mine only, I am determined to see the real world.
LESSON 21: I Am Determined To See Things Differently.
I am free to see anything any way I like. But I cannot escape the consequences of how I see.
LESSON 22: What I See Can Be A Form Of Vengeance.
It would be only my own attack thoughts that could give rise to such a picture picture.
LESSON 23: I Can Escape From A World Of Vengeance By Giving Up Attack Thoughts.
Without attack thoughts I could not see a world of attack. I can just as well see a world of peace and safety and joy. But does either lead me closer to the real world?
LESSON 24: Sometimes I Do Not Perceive My Own Best Interests.
How can I recognize my own best interests? What I think are my best interests could merely trap me in a world of illusions. I am willing to be responsible for discovering my own best interests. I can do it by myself.
LESSON 25: I May Not Know What Something Is For.
I may be deceiving myself that my illusions about myself are real. Thinking that the world has a purpose is my judgment, or my interpretation, or my illusion. Let me open my mind to a world with no purpose.
LESSON 26: My Attack Thoughts Attack My Own Vulnerability.
What am I doing if I see myself as under constant attack? What if pain, illness, loss, age, and death seem to threaten me? What if all my hopes, and wishes, and plans appear to be at the mercy of a world I cannot control? What can I do... other than "grin and bear it?"
LESSON 27: Above All Else I Want To See Clearly.
Recognizing that what I see reflects what I think, I realize that clear vision is my greatest need. If I see a "negative" world, does this reflect a "negative" self-image I have created? Can I let go such an image of myself?
LESSON 28: Above All Else I Want To See Differently.
The world I see can hold my self-image in place, and guarantee its continuance. Chinese proverb: "He with head up backside sees shitty world!"
LESSON 29: I Can Be The Victim Of The World I See.
How can I be the victim of a world that I can undo if I so choose? Can I loosen my chains? Can I drop them off merely by desiring to do so? Can I open the prison door? Can I leave simply by walking out? What can hold me in this world? What if my wish to stay keeps me a prisoner? Can I give up my the wishes that have kept me stuck in my prison, and walk out into the sunlight?
LESSON 30: Have I Invented The World I See?
Did I make up a prison in which I see myself? What do I need to recognize to free myself?
LESSON 31: There Is Another Way Of Looking At The World.
Whatever purpose I may have ascribed to the world is not the purpose of the world. So there must be another way of looking at the world. What if I've been seeing things upside down, with my thoughts the opposite of the truth? What if I see the world as a prison, but it's really the place for me to be free?
LESSON 32: My Mind Is My Own.
Can the world I look upon be a reflection of my illusions I keep hidden from myself? How can I flush out the illusions and make my mind truly my own? Do I need any thoughts other than my own?
LESSON 33: I Can Forgive Myself and Others.
Having forgiven myself and others, I no longer have to see myself as guilty. And I can let go of any grudges I may have born against others. I can accept myself as I am, and I can accept others as they are.
LESSON 34: What Can I Achieve?
What is there that I cannot do? What powers might I have? What limitations in my mind can I let go? What illusions might be holding me back? What false ideas might I have about myself? What idols might pollute my mind?
LESSON 35: What Should I Fear?
What makes me afraid? What endagers my life? What loss, or deprivation, or pain need I suffer? What fears can I get rid of?
LESSON 36: What Support And Protection Do I Need?
Who will support and protect me if I do not first support and protect myself?
LESSON 37: What Companionship Do I Need?
Can I live with myself? Can I be sure of myself on my own? What do I really need? What illusions about myself can keep my life unfulfilled? What false "needs" can I let go?
LESSON 38: What Can I Be Responsible For?
How can I be responsible for my health, wealth, and happiness? Is there anything I should blame on others or things outside myself?
LESSON 39: Who Other Than Myself Is The Source And The Creator Of My Life?
My parents gave birth to me. Now I have left my childhood home, I have grown up, and I stand on my own feet. Can I see the real world by myself as I can best see it?
LESSON 40: Who Can Stop Me?
To what extent can others stop me? To what extent can I stop myself? When do I have to allow others to stop me?
LESSON 41: When Others Say Things About Me, What Does It Mean?
What others say mean nothing. Mostly, when other people say "bad" things about me, they're just projecting their own "badness" onto me. I don't have to take anything anybody says personally. It means nothing.
LESSON 42: What Meaning Do These Lessons Have?
These lessons have no meaning. They mean nothing. Whatever meaning you may ascribe to them is your meaning in your head. You create all your meanings. You are responsible for all your meanings.
LESSON 43: What Meaning Does the Universe Have?
The universe has no meaning. Thank the universe for having no meaning; really express your gratitude to the universe. Because, if it had a meaning, it would have been the wrong meaning!
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